Did u hear about the shooting at the Twin Peaks in Waco TX?

Posted by carles | May 20, 2015 | 72 Comments

U want a poddy? Here it is.

Did u hear about that breastraunt?
Twin Peaks in Waco TX?
The bikers shot eachother there.

I just want to eat my ‘fat people appetizers’ in peace.

I just wanted to be surrounded by ‘slutz showing their tits’ while they bring me fried food and sliders with queso to dip in various sweet sauces.

Do u evr wish u could just take ur family to a breastraunt to eat a quality meal served by ‘slutz’?

Feels like WARFARE [via unlawful motorcycle gangs] is just ruining the sterile, welcoming establishment I would like at my local franchise.

Feel pretty scared of bikers now. I guess ‘suburban chains’ aren’t as safe as I once thought since they attract ‘rural mobile-wave gangs’

So sad that 9 bikers are dead

Can we end ‘white trash’ on ‘white trash’ warfare?
Why do we keep killing our own ppl, yall?

Will Twin Peaks close? Did they ‘steal trade secrets’ from Hooters?

Should we be more afraid of bikers? I thought they were just fat dudes on motorcycles.

Now I learned that they are drug traffickers.

I feel like bikers were just ‘pretending 2 be kewl’, and they weren’t actually mafia-level drug bros who help America’s underground economy supply chain

If u were a girl with big breasts, would u rather work at Twin Peaks or Hooters?

Thank God I only go to Contemporary Conformist establishments where the waitresses think they are ‘beautiful’ because of their aesthetic + their connection to a ‘restaurant on the rise.’

Be careful at breastraunts, yall.

Is suburbia safe?
Are ‘chains’ now for ‘ruralites’ to think are nice?
Do suburbanites want Contemporary Conformist establishments instead of chains?
Have u ever been to Twin Peaks and ordered a Man Sized beer?
Do u fear bikers?
Should they ‘lay off’ the chain food? [via portion sizes]
What would u do if u found urself in the middle of a gun fight at a breastraunt?

Do u like to eat at places where u can see tits?
How did this happen?
Do ‘backwards’ people find chains to be TOO approachable [via scaling to the masses]?
Will breastraunts last 4evr, or are they a bubble?
Would u rather eat at HOOTERS, Tilted Kilt, Bikinis, or Twin Peaks?

If this post gets 50 comments, I will post another poddy. (aka podcast)

Related topix: Breastraunt, Suburbia, Twin Peaks, unlawful motorcycle gangs, Waco TX

Read more blogs abt Podcast

HROwaves

firsties y’all ! in on the poddy !
Me

Crls bb
Good to hear ur robot ass voice again
So Sry that purchasing ur wife
Her big fake tits
didn’t pan out for you
Or her either
considering how fat she got
At such a young age
She sure looks
Beat down
Bro
I mean
Yikes

Anyway tho
At least u got ~

Oh wait no
U pretty much lost everything
But hey
Ur back
Ur better than ever

And always remember this =
If u can’t grow em
&U don’t wanna ‘buy em’
Then stick w working on ur ass
It’s just as effective
In fact
Ask around
It’s better

Luv u bb
ry

Chili’s > all breastraunts
SXSW egg rolls
<3 u
miss u
niggo

your poddy is wack
carles #1 fan

I’m actually crying as I listen
- Me
  
  Resetless sinners
  Reckless serenade
  
  Stick to bicycles
  And butts
  
  Do it for our country
  The red
  White
  and blue
  Via Oxford comma
  
  Protein based diets
  Go veg
  Eat clean
  Quit _
  Stay kewl
  U r so cool
  True romance
  
  Twin peaks like David lynch for days
  U killed Laura Palmer
  Godam it
  #spoileralert
  
  http://elitedaily.com/life/culture/theres-finally-answer-men-either-boob-guys-ass-guys/941675/
- JacquiChan
  
  I’ve been craving a Crls poddy for so long
  - Me
    
    Me= carles = carles #1 fan
    - Me!!!!!!
      
      Will the real me
      Please stand up!!!!’
      God please
      Blog about donuts!!!!
      - carles #1 fan
        
        yummy yum
- carles #1 fan
  
  Carles = carles #1 fan = Me
- HOMOSAPIEN_FUCK
  
  Just gonna slip into the replies here.
  
  Carles. What is this. Molecular Mixology? Sounds like dudes who never went to college giving themselves fake phds.
  http://www.downtowntucson.org/2015/05/highwire-puts-downtown-tucson-map-molecular-mixology-methods/
- ar12
  
  Meanwhile, 36 people were murdered in Baltimore since Freddy Gray. 22 of which were in West Baltimore…
  
  But thats none of our business…#hypocrites
carles #1 fan

you crazy for this one bruh #willingtomakeall50commentsmyself
- Me
  
  Do it bb
  Do it
  
  Big boobies need u
  2
  But we all know
  U guys
  Are
  Ass
  Men
  
  Miss yall
  - Crs
    
    Let’s get #Koreshed y’all
- carles #1 fan #1 fan
  
  Tell me if you need help with the 50 comments, will you?
  
  For example, I could come over and prepare some snacks for you, keep you hydrated and healthy while you’re being the sweet angel that you are. #willingtodoeverythingforcarlesno1fanakasweetangel
  
  Because, you know, I’m your #1 fan! And you’re my sweet angel.
  - carles #1 fan
    
    looks like we are almost there bb
    - carles #1 fan #1 fan
      
      Do you think we’ll ever make it?
      
      Cannot stop – don’t want to stop – thinking of you, my sweet sweet angel. I’m your #1 fan.
      - carles #1 fan
        
        yes I think we will
        
        if you keep up like this I’ll be Carles #1 Fan #1 Fan’s #1 Fan,
        lmao!!
      - Me
        
        But wait
        What about me?????
        I need yAll
        I mean
        Like really
        Like the sunshine
        Please
        Please me
        Oh yea
        Like I please u!!!!!!
        
        I hate stupid people
        Been around the world and found
        That only stupid people
        Are breeding
Jonathan

Ur getting some insane laugh breaks
ChrisBrownSwag

as a feminist,
- HOMOSAPIEN_FUCK
  
  Makes me think of think pieces and all the think pieces I saw on my “smart” FB friend’s timelines.
  “OMG can you believe how the media talks about white thugs vs black thugs”
  “Why is no one calling these boys a thugs”
  “Why the media is protecting White Thugs”
  “This is a white on white crime and Conservatives……”
  - n2whyteguyz
    
    okay?
    - HOMOSAPIEN_FUCK
      
      Yes im ok.. you?
http://www.twitter.com/macostarz macostarz

Woot woot. Gonna assume there’s a breastraunt cameo/subplot in twin peaks
- Bronello_Cucinelli
  
  some damn fine chipotle ranch buffalo wings ya got here in twin peaks! –the mayor of portland
ethnic jazz

u r on some tim and eric outre andy kaufman anti-humor, bb. let’s talk about thee art tease anal lifestyle instead of odd podcvsts, dood.
stewart

Another one
KONY_2K12

<3 <3 <3 <3 #thx4poddy
fizzle

very experimental and very weird. kinda like avant garde net stylings.
dat_bro06

‘bikers’ seems like one of those things that will just ‘go away’ over time . . like the KKK, or perhaps ppl who watch baseball. but alas ‘there is no such thing as progress’… i have 2 remember i have moved into a predominantly CC region but there is still a place called Waco #rememberWaco

‘having said that’ ya’ll these bb’s are about two standard deviations HOTTER than i would expect at a biker bar …

TEQUILA!
- dat_bro06
  
  yo this is a really, wacky ass podcast … here’s just another throwaway comment …
  
  here are some words:
  Bikes can stunt a youth development in two ways
  First of all..u can become a 45 yr. old ‘master blaster’
  U can spend 10-30% of your discretionary income on a high end ‘road bicycle’
  U can wear tight fitting bicycling clothing…
  U can craft an identity for urself around the notion of ‘pushing yourself real hard’ and ‘riding around w u bros’
  
  Or..
  U can as Carl says, become an obese lumbersexual motorcyclist
  U can engage in mass gang warfare . . at . . Twin Peaks . . the breastaurant
  U can read ‘Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance’
  Or nah
  (via illiteracy)
  Pls continue to disturb our daily lives with your loud machines
  (or maybe ya’ll should kill urselves)
  - http://www.twitter.com/macostarz macostarz
    
    feel like the author of zen and the art of motorcycle maintenance missed out on the outlaw life by reading too much—too much of an ‘observer’ and not enough of a ‘doer.’
    
    books don’t teach you the ‘life lessons’ of experiencing #livingonthewildside (aka spirit of #yolo). Being ‘off the grid’ wasn’t enough… maybe he shoulda tossed his book & brought a ‘good ol’ firearm’ along on his journey instead…? (The bullets aren’t important; the gun does the talking for you)
    
    “Speak softly and carry a big stick”
carlesfan123789

lmao
laff-bro

I used to think that Tilted Kilt refered to a traditional scottish garment. But now I realize it’s a warning that if you enter – you might get killed
Chrill-Chrill

Do y’all think it would be kewl & “scalable” to make a Contemporary Conformist Breastaurant? like where there was subway tile and reclaimed wood and funky light fixtures and craft beer and “single origin” espresso served by “stacked babes” in chambray/selvedge denim? or maybe it would be more “boho” like teepees and shit?
- Chrill-Chrill
  
  Oh and it could have “craft cocktails” made by a “smoking hot” mixologist.
JacquiChan

Crls can do a poddy anytime and I’ll eat it up.
xo

YAY!
Ce Ele

OMG bb are you okay!!? ;-(
jes

plz, i love pods.
Christian Rock

P.O.D.
- Bronello_Cucinelli
  
  Great username + post combo
poop

great poddy carlesy
JacquiChan

CARLES IS BACK
Ben Smith

carles bro, i love the podcast but can you “chill” with the annoying sound effects
Clinton Triumph

Thats why i’m happy my town has 2 whole foods 5 miles apart and road bikers
http://www.rezerectedrecords.com/wormwood Wormwood

your voice is very soothing
fart party 64

It’s a wonderful thing to hear your voice, Carles.
Sierra

So nine people were killed in a shooting in a restaurant, this could stir a debate on gun possession, displays of unjustified violence, southern social culture, etc. It could be brilliantly done without losing his peculiar satyrical quality, but carles makes it all about boobs. There was a time when carles wrote thinkpieces that were actually thought provoking, but not anymore. I guess he’s definitely trying ‘unscale’, by limiting c.buzz’s audience to ‘middle-american’ ‘man-child'(s), whereas HRO was once a global youth phenomenon. As a non-american, non-male, non-simple-minded reader of c.buzz, I’ve been finding it hard to relate to this ‘9 ppl died but hehee look at these boobies teeheehee’ bullcrap. Carles is 30 going on 13, apparently.
- ar12
  
  “this could stir a debate on gun possession, displays of unjustified violence, southern social culture, etc”
  
  Not really. 9 outlaw motorcycle gang members, aka criminals, were killed. No one (other than law enforcement) cares.
  - Sierra
    
    I’m not saying we should mourn their death. I’m just saying Carles wasted an opportunity to make brilliant social criticism by writing a vague, pointless post all about ‘boobies’. I am not saying we should not talk about boobies. I, for one, am a fan of nipslips and sideboobs, but boobs are not even related to this case. So why make it about them? Unless the writer is a horny 13 year old that gets a boner when he accidentally touches a teenage girl’s boob in gym class, the whole thing sounds silly to me.
    - n2whyteguyz
      
      “I am not saying we should not talk about boobies. I, for one, am a fan of nipslips and sideboobs”
      
      ah, that’s what’s going on. your predilection for breasts is distracting you from “what this article is about”
- forgetit
  
  man. i see in this the break unbreak thingiverse of a rule.
  to create an even uneven rule by emotional empathy.
  the impulse of sex seems as pressured as tears.
  intense and sometimes insane.
  making us shown as most profound like fighting in war.
  a hungry animal.
  - Sierra
    
    dats trippy
ar12

#whitetrashlivesmatter
carles #1 fan

how many years do you think the appeals will go before jahar is executed

do u think massachusetts still will have death penalty in 15 years

carles what is your net worth can you loan me a grand tbh

the nastiest part of this podcast was when u said ‘Why do people go to breastaurants’ and ‘I feel bad when women are sluts because I have moms and sisters’

god i hated it when you said that stuff
- carles #1 fan
  
  is carles mad @ me
boody

hey carles,
i would love to hear some podcast from you, because your voice is pretty damn great and over air it sometimes makes me calm and makes me want much more meditate.
i read in the news about the twin peaks thing, got paranoid about it.
like fucking scared the shit out of me when i see from now on someone wearing leather jacket and riding a bike. dont like the smell of it. wouldn’t wear leather either.
it is horrible. it started at the toilet the news said. dont know.
thought it were a woman thing to overrun the restroom. dk.

bye man, you are fucking great..
it sometimes hard for me to connect to you writing.
dont know. some culture differences. social structures. class thing i guess.

looking forward to your podcast.
may you can talk about chinese children from devendra banhart?

xoxo
- carles #1 fan
  
  well out of my toes
  my little black baby grows
  and that’s my fact
carles #1 fan

the nihilists in the big lebowski were auth
marrr

I find something almost Lynchesque about this podcast (“Rabbits”, 2002).
Is it a coincidence?
Me

Omg bb
Thank u for the donuts
Swoon
Ways to my heart
Deep down fat kid!
Or not
So delish
Luv u

miss u
always
u are me
thank u
http://www.twitter.com/macostarz macostarz

50 comments! Good job guys. Carles: next time please consider including some musical interludes :]
Bronello_Cucinelli

Just listening to this now
Unsure abt carles’s shift from bret easton elliswave to neil hamburgercore
Eric George

I liked your site until you posted this.
- Kevin George
  
  I thought this post insightful actually, even though the distastefulness of it. Present Gangs may just not be authentic enough to enjoy ‘contemporary conformist’ restaurants.
  
  It is easy to dismiss the positive ‘vibes’ promoted by this culture that actually may resonate throughout the community.
  
  I think there is a lot of truth to “‘backwards’ people find[ing] chains to be TOO approachable”
  
  Street kids just feel safer walking into a mcDs bathroom to shoot heroine and grab a meal compared to walking into a authentic restaurant and doing the same. Even when some of these other restaurants actually try to cater to the less fortunate.
  
  Is dining at a chain restaurants enabling backwards behavior?
  
  There is an anonymity at these chain restaurants with their high employee turnover rate that might just make a ‘backwards’ person feel safer.
Middle Row on the Right

Can’t believe that Jared Leto has got time to roll around with a biker crew. Bro stays busy. Bet those guys get to hear all the early TSTM demos, jelly.
Lexi

Just drove by that twin peaks as you mentioned it just now on xmu hahaha
stewart

This has a flippant quality to it, but I sense something very dark lurking underneath the surface. But it seems darkness is a natural response to some of the vacuousness in our culture. This is straight up provocative, if it isn’t just dismissed as lightly ironic, which I don’t think it entirely is.

Carles.buzz

In search of a meaningful/authentic human/internet experience.

Did u hear about the shooting at the Twin Peaks in Waco TX?