hi. i feel misunderstood.

Posted by carles | May 27, 2015 | 61 Comments

Sorry for trying to connect. This project is just an extinction burst. I will be gone soon.

Sorry for letting me down, self.

Previous auth p0sts

Who is getting ‘the boot’?
Email from reader.
To Auth or Contemp or Conform?
Sorry 4 letting every1 down.
  • MetaJD

    Carles you did not let anyone down. You are a legend for still-forming generation; of which everyone knows you are, whether they admit it or not. The people who matter followed you like clockwork and incorporated what you wrote into their day-to-day philosophy.

    You wrote commentary on something that wasn’t being talked about at all. You burst a bubble that no one even realized was a bubble. The impact is still being felt and the people you inspired are out there making moves as we speak.

    The people who understand you the most don’t need to comment or talk because you sincerely helped them see a unique, innovative perspective that has since elevated their life beyond the internet and all the bullshit that’s been bringing you down.

    Please just know that what you’ve done is not going to be forgotten, at least not by me, and that there’s no way you can possibly fail when you’ve already inspired so many people.

    • l8pdigrr

      Fuckin’ true, that. Carles rocks.

    • http://www.twitter.com/macostarz macostarz

      the signal and the noise

      …carles, you are the ‘signal’ (via a cyberspace beacon of hope amid a limitless void of nothing that matters)

      • marrr

        And I add to this.
        You seem to be an exception in a biggest point of yours, Carles. And I can’t decide if it’s a good or a bad thing.

    • KONY_2K12

      “The people who understand you the most don’t need to comment or talk because you sincerely helped them realize a unique, innovative perspective that has since elevated their life beyond the internet ”

      ^^^^this bb

    • Cyberbully bro

      Cool story, bro

    • cuntmafia

      dis tru

  • ry

    Carles,
    never give up
    Indie culture is harsh sometimes
    Indie writers are mean sometimes…

  • Bronello_Cucinelli

    why do you feel that way, carles? talk 2 me bb…
    <3 u
    <3 'the carles dot buzz community'
    #pray4carles
    #pray4slainbikers

    • Bromo Sexual

      carles, I feel the blur between contempconfomries and lamestream is officially undistinguishable.

      u give voice to all those that struggle with false ass binaries between lame stream and alt-wave

      Long time bro who comes here to “vibe”

      First time comment.

      Idk.

      Feels real.

  • Me

    Bb no!!!!!
    I live for u

    Please
    I need u

  • Michael

    Dont go Carles

  • Jonathan

    I don’t understand. Keep going. Keep living. Do it on your own terms!

    • Authopedic

      this is very inspiring.

  • is she for real?

    god, now i think that this is a strange moment. it made it completely awkward.
    i feel deep angst. that i did something wrong. completely over run with emotion. like panic. caught ya.
    i feel touched as a ball of negativity. sometimes i absorb all the things around me.
    like a light pulp which is in my belly. and then i start to eat. or writing to someone.
    hope that this makes sense.

    the dramatically voice is shouting from the off – i made him gone forever.
    the curtain falls.

    • Me

      Wow bb
      Wow
      Spill it
      Eye of the tiger
      Waves

    • H.D. Broreau

      really wish this would be the only comment on the internet ever

  • next time i get an account.

    most i like the song – the safety and meth freaks.
    am i tripping to hard carles? am i hurting others with being me carles?
    am i even talking to someone outside my heart carles?
    is everything alright with me and the world carles?
    carles can you hear me. or am i the only one who hears voices carles.

    i feel alone and blessed.

    • Authopedic

      i am tripping to hard carles also.

  • Mulch Aiken

    wat is this discus app?

    It makes me not want to post.

    I do not like ‘signing in with facebook’

    I’m worried that someone will see my suss browsing history

    Keep posting because everyone feels the same as I do

    • http://www.twitter.com/macostarz macostarz

      2k15 is the year of #nofilter—align all your social network identities while remaining true to yourself, yet professional (it’s easier than it sounds).

      I’m usually behind on things, but I’m pretty sure that’s what’s ‘in’ right now

      • Authopedic

        i did a little sick-up.

  • signapse

    Carles wtf. you are the only auth presence left. you cannot leave us stranded here in the middle of this bleak contempconformmie hellscape. we need you. pls.

  • Me

    Crls bb
    Was it the sun?
    Epic sun shots?
    Orbs
    _|« yoga

    ~#
    4 ppl who also listen pearl jam

    ɐboʎ «|»\________

    hot fun in the summertime?
    At home
    Drawing pictures
    Of mountaintops
    W him on top
    Lemon yellow sun
    Palm trees
    http://hyelife.hubpages.com/hub/Role-of-the-Sun-in-Albert-Camus-The-Stranger

  • Cbo

    Carles is back y’all. Hope he doesn’t join the big Twins Peaks in the sky. We will always be Moon Killers via Small Blacks

  • nauth boy

    carles dont give up
    like those biker bros who gave up their life
    at that breastaurant

    1 day
    we will all take 4ever nappies
    we must keep going
    to find a connection as strong as those
    dead bikers

    dont go
    dont go

  • carles #1 fan #1 fan

    Sorry to say, but I could not care less. All I want to know is where carles #1 fan is!

    If you’re reading this my sweet angel, I’m still thinking of you. All. The. Time. I’m your #1 fan! You’re my sweet angel!

    • carles #1 fan

      kisses

      • Me

        All the time
        Is a lot
        Well we all
        Need someone
        We can
        Learn on

  • carles #1 fan

    very classic post

  • ron

    just do what you want bb
    ppl dnt kno how hurtful they can be
    ppl dnt know what they’re searching 4

    at the end of our lives well be gifted
    with what we knew mattered
    and what didn’t

    ppl <3 stories
    ppl <3 true stories
    ppl <3 #journalism

    but no1 knos why…

    give us a reason
    tell us something that gives ppl like us
    a reason to live

    #hoobastank

  • STINKY

    Carles do u live in nyc? I am visiting next week (via a 33 y/o going to his first auth music festival (Governors Ball)). Let’s go to Chelsea and buy $11 bacon egg and cheese sandwiches and then walk all the way to Times Square and get them doused in donkey sauce at Guy Fieri’s restaurant. We can get drunk and reminisce about how awesome 2008 was.

    • carles #1 fan

      he doesnt live in nyc silly billy

      • STINKY

        Do you? Y’all wanna party?

        • Authopedic

          i would like to party your face into a pile of hot dog turds and reminisce about how awesome your face being in hot dog turds was.

          • Bronello_Cucinelli

            hope u r all excited the first EP from my band, Hot Dog Turds. out next month. pls follow us on social media

          • Authopedic

            why i oughta….

      • carles #1 fan #1 fan

        ‘silly billy’

        You’re such a cutie pie, my sweet angel.

        I’m going to spend the rest of the day singing your name. Because I’m your #1 fan.

        • Me

          He lives in
          Yea they have good pizza
          Donuts too there
          I still want breakfast

          Take one day at a time
          Only one day at a time

          Lion
          In
          A
          Coma

  • Authopedic

    i am nostalgic for the comments section on carlez.bb circa jan ’15
    those were the days
    we had it all, bro

    2 roads diverged in a wood, and i –
    i took the one which lead to a guy in a ski mask hiding behind a tree
    and that has made all the difference.

  • marrr

    I may have got a sort of answer to my semi-personal question from an email that you never answered.
    You’re not giving up anything or letting anyone down, Carles. You’re just having a little trouble finishing something.

  • marrr

    You still ”owe” us a podcast. I wish my comments were legit monetary units..

  • stewart

    Nooo! Keep going

  • alexander

    crazy weather y’all are getting!

  • JacquiChan

    I can’t live without u bb

    #praying4carles and sending ~~~ vibes ~~~

  • pls

    carles. dont go. i need u.

    • pls

      but also dont go doing something if it is “emotionally draining” for you.
      just know you are doing something that is making a differene

  • dog

    carles please no
    you’ve given words to things i’ve only ever felt
    things i didn’t realize i felt
    thank you

  • carles #1 fan

    Do you really want the Nauth Hater Supremacy to win Carlos

    • Me

      Exactly waves
      Bb
      Ur so spot on
      W ur sharp hair
      And all

      Miss u

  • Me

    I mean right?

    • carles #1 fan

      the nothing is coming bbs!

  • coolguy69@hotmail.com

    Carles will livestream his suicide on Twitch.tv, in which he binges on fifty pre-2009 caffeinated Sparks cans while wearing an AmAppy-style “Legalize Nothing” T-shirt and blasting Steve Aoki’s Warp on repeat, then suffers a violent spasmodic heart attack shortly after. His final breath will be punctuated by canned laughter, followed by looping public domain ukulele/glockenspiel folkstream music as the webcam remains fixed on his stiffening corpse.

  • Authathens

    Hey Carles, it’s me Authathens. Don’t change, but also don’t end things. You’re good, you just don’t entirely understand. The signal vs. noise thing is a good metaphor. Pitchfork is a corrupt mess, while Carles.buzz is still completely awesome.

    Okay, that’s all for now. Write back?

  • Sierra

    stop crying and apologizing and go back to being the fucking awesome bro i know you can be. miss u carlos. miss u…

  • Kogger

    I SERIOUSLY CAN NOT

  • Kogger

    Missing Feb’ 15 days, when I had tons of good Carles in front of me, and some good stuff ‘in the bag’.

  • maluut

    Just post more auth music

  • Ninja

    Yes bb.

  • Diego Murga

    remain

  • HollyBroLightly

    my therapist urged me to urge you to keep at it…i fell myself leaning over the precipice…without your words of encouragement, bb, i fear that i may take yet another nosedive